Only the Lonely
by paynesgrey
Summary: The Tardis reminds the Doctor he has one more adventure, to teach the lonely Alice Shaw a vital importance of her gifts. Takes place after "Waters of Mars", and a couple years after "1961" in Coyote Sands. ONESHOT.


AN: Written for #58, The Girl Who Does Not Know Herself, for 100_fairytales on Livejournal. Fandoms: Doctor Who and Heroes. **Spoilers:** Takes place after "Waters of Mars" (DW), and a couple years after "1961" in Coyote Sands (Heroes). This is a one-shot.

Only the Lonely

He'd been popping around time and space, saving people, causing mischief, and avoiding the inevitable. He knew what was waiting for him - four knocks on a door and then his death. He'd been running from it; he felt like a huge coward sometimes, but it was just as well. No one could blame him from running away from death and denying the fact that he would likely die alone.

And he was so lonely, but it was better this way and he knew it. Too many people had died or were ruined because of him, because he was a danger to them all. He was never a danger to himself, but he attracted people - sang them a song like a piper and brought them to their doom. Some were saved of course, and some wouldn't remember. Some would move on. Those were the lucky ones.

So he traveled alone. Maybe he was always meant to - he'd gotten cocky over the years and lifetimes, bringing humans and aliens alike on his travels with him, blinded by the lure of the stars and never really knowing the weight of the danger that loomed over their heads. Foolishly, he believed himself infallible at times, and he learned a hard lesson that it wasn't so.

The Tardis whirred at him, and his eyes widened when his course to Elizabethan England was changing mid-stream. In all his moping, he'd been too late to realize that the Tardis had made a decision for him. Maybe she was just tired of him brooding, so she made a choice for him all on her own. He scrambled around the controls and looked at the dial and furrowed his brow. Why was he coming _here_? Why now? He was so close to getting one last hurrah in before the inevitable, before the sound of four knocks that will draw him unto his final path.

"What?" He looked around, and automatically, his fingers and arms began working the controls, bringing the Tardis to a stop at its own destination. He squinted at the readouts, and with a pit in his stomach, he realized he'd arrived in another fixed point in time. This time, however, he would refuse to open the doors.

"I'm not going to change it," he said resolutely, and like a nudge inside his head, the Tardis fueled him onward. He was wrong again. The Doctor studied the date again - t_hink, think, think_ - and he realized that he was just a little bit ahead of things, maybe a year or two. He wasn't in danger of spoiling anything - of destroying any one's lives like he did on Mars.

The door opened for him. "Blimey, you're persistent," he said, making a face at the insides of the Tardis. He sauntered outside, and the wind whipped bits of sand on his face. He knew where he was, and like a snap of a rubber band of memory in his brain, he knew what he must do.

"Ah, Coyote Sands," he said. He knew it well. It was tragic, which only seemed to spawn more tragedy. Here he was at the dawn of the human race, changing and evolving, and they weren't ready for it. They weren't ready for the possibility to be more than they were, and the Doctor knew - even forty to fifty years from now, they never would be.

The place was a wasteland. The stench of bodies whispered on the wind. A lot of people died here, a lot of people silenced for what they were, what they could do, and the world would never hear their story. Somebody changed that - changed time, somebody not him - and he was still disallowed to interfere.

Sand crunched under his feet, and he could feel the wind tugging at the back of his coat. He looked about the site. The air was wetter than it should be. He pulled out his screwdriver. It made a quick buzz, and he realized he didn't need even it.

"Alright then, where are you?" he called out to the howling forces. He began walking forward as no one answered, and he sniffed at the old blood on the air. Turning around, he realized that the whirlwind was just around the Coyote Sands compound - sealing it in, hiding it from the outside world. This was no natural act. Someone was keeping him inside, and on the outskirts, his Tardis waited as the whirlwind encased him inside, shrinking as it cycled around him.

His footsteps were stalled when he stepped on something soft. He looked down, and when he saw the plush toy on the ground, he remembered the grave reality of this place. Children were once relocated here and packed away for experimentation and study. Children died here, and their songs of sorrow and pain would forever ride the tails of the wind.

"Hello!" he called again. "I want to speak to Alice Shaw!"

Oh, he knew of her, of course, the lonely human girl with the powers of a god. He'd met her before, with a different face, but he knew of her. She'd been old then, still scorning the humanity that left her behind - still agonizing over the absence of her sister. When he met her, she'd been close to death. But she came away with him - one last time to save an entire planet from an ecological catastrophe. Oh, Alice Shaw, he thought, she was brilliant.

The winds died down, and the Doctor was grateful he no longer tasted sand on his lips.

"How do you know my name?" said a small voice behind him. The Doctor whipped around, and he met the curious eyes of a dark-haired little girl. She was dirty and unkempt. Her clothes were ratty, and she was far too skinny for her size. In a quick second, he pitied her, but he knew what she could do, and his sadness subsided. Instead, he felt an affinity with her, so alone and so dangerous to others. He remembered her older version telling him her sister told her to stay so she would be safe. She had stayed only to make other safe from herself. In a way, the Doctor felt much like that.

"Ah, well, we've met before," he said, putting his hands in his pockets. He walked up slowly to her, but she didn't seem afraid.

"We have? Are you one of the doctors from here?"

He shook his head. "No, no, I'm not from here, but I am the Doctor." She tilted her head in curiosity.

"I don't need a doctor. You have to go," she warned. The air suddenly became cold like ice.

"You have a gift, don't you Alice?" he said, kneeling in front of her at eye level.

"It's a curse. It's done nothing but ruined my life," she said offended.

"_Weeelll,_ I have sort of a curse myself too," he said sympathetically.

Her eyes widened. "Like what?" She raised her chin and he watched as she seemed to be listening to the wind. "You came in a strange box. It's sitting in my desert."

"It's my time machine," he said bluntly, gauging her reaction.

"Is that your power? Time-travel?" she asked, and her tone seemed a little more excited. "There was a time traveler here once. He's gone now. Escaped. I've read his file." She paused. "I've read all the files."

"Of course you have," he answered her cautiously.

"So we met in another time," she said distantly. He was slightly amazed by her. This child, all alone by herself; he could only wonder the things she knew - the things she learned from the scope of her powers. Her intellect fell short on some things, socially he'd guess. But her eyes were old, and strangely enough, they reminded him of Susan from years ago.

"Alice," he said, and the Doctor rose to his feet. "Are you lonely here?" He looked around at the desecrated buildings, already decaying exponentially thanks to the effects of her powers.

"I have to be. I'll hurt people. I don't want any one else to die." She looked at the sand around her bare feet. "Banana said I'd be safe here. I trust her."

"Banana, was that your sister?" he asked. He knew about her sister, and some day, Alice would know too. Her grief, right now, for her sister was in vain. She shouldn't know - not yet, that her sister survived, ran away and left her behind. The Doctor pitied the poor child even more.

"I'm lonely for the same reason. I'm a danger to others myself," he offered. "But this one time, Alice, I'm asking you to not be lonely with your curse. I'm asking you to use it."

Alice furrowed her brow. "How? It only destroys and hurts! It doesn't do any good!"

"No, but it can," he said. "I've seen what you can do." He paused and met her eyes. "You're right to be scared. Your powers are dangerous. I'm not going to lie to you."

"I don't understand," she said.

The Doctor held out his hand. "I need you to come with me, just once, to see that your powers can do some good. Alice, you have a gift and a curse, and if you come with me now, you will learn so much about it - that you can use it, that you can do so much more than hurt people." He pursed his lips and reached. "You can save them."

Fear and wonder glittered in her eyes. The Doctor had seen that look before, and he only felt a tinge of regret that this liaison would not last. Like him, Alice Shaw would be alone again. Still, she was needed just this once.

Her small hand rested over his palm, and he squeezed lightly before drawing her away. Coyote Sands quieted, feeling more like the ghost town it was meant to be. Alice Shaw was the reason the spirits stirred and once he took her away - even for this moment - it was would rest, until the day Alice Shaw would finally get her answers and find her peace.

Cautiously, she walked behind him with his hand still around hers as he drew her into the Tardis. Most children would not go so willingly, but somehow, Alice felt the need to trust him. He couldn't explain it; well, that and she was far more harmful to him than he was to her - her abilities alone could probably rip him apart.

He thought he'd have to fight harder to convince her, to ask her to leave loneliness behind for one good deed. Yet, it was quite obvious she was following him by her own boredom and curiosity. He could definitely relate to that.

When Alice walked into the Tardis, she reacted all the usual ways, and it pleased him - making her seem more like a normal little girl than a special child hidden away in the desert as a dangerous secret. She marveled at the "bigger on the inside" and "otherworldly tools" that defined his spaceship, and she watched him cautiously as the Tardis began to power up and take them away. She hovered over him, watching and studying as he worked the controls and flew them away. Normally, he wouldn't do this. He didn't want to bring on another companion, not when he was so close to the end. However, he couldn't argue with the Tardis, and she was right. A whole future civilization depended upon him to bring them Alice Shaw.

-0-

The Tardis landed harshly, and Alice fell back against him for a moment to gain her balance. She followed as he motioned her toward the door, and when they exited, Alice looked with awe at the other world - acrid and full of barren terrain much like Coyote Sands. Alice ran ahead of him aghast, and she stopped and turned around to meet him.

"Where are we? What is this place?"

"It's another planet called Mrexius. It's dying, but it's not too late," the Doctor asked.

"I can feel it. I can feel the pain of everything - on the wind, in the soil," she said, and she shut her eyes tightly as the empathy crawled over her.

"It was ravaged by invaders and stripped of its minerals," the Doctor said, walking up to her side. "The survivors are starving, and the planet can no longer sustain them or itself." He looked down at her. "If you do not help them, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions and drought will tear this planet apart. A whole civilization will disappear." He paused and he placed a hand on her shoulder. "But it doesn't have to."

"Why me? What can I do?" Alice asked nervously. The Doctor recognized the emotion on her face. She doubted herself already. Oh, poor Alice Shaw. She didn't know the things she could do.

"You are written in their history - well, I am too, but I'm not as important. I'm just a messenger. You, Alice Shaw, are their savior," he answered.

Her face turned white, but in her silence, he watched her close her eyes and listen to the dying song of the planet again. The pain she felt was pushing away her fears. "I'll try. I'll try to do whatever I can."

The Doctor stood back and nodded. Alice held out her hands, and he could feel the air changing and the earth rumbling softly under his feet. He looked behind him, and then back, and when he looked into the sky, Alice had levitated off the ground, high in the sky for any life form to see if they just looked up. He stepped back, and the weather became heavy, with rain and thunder and the earth cracking all around him. The Doctor began back to his Tardis, leaning against it as Alice began her work. Alice protected him and the Tardis, and the space around them changed slowly, as everything else was reborn drastically around the whole planet. The Doctor witnessed tornadoes, electric storms, blizzards, and rolling fog. The dirt under his feet began to spring with life - accelerated beyond natural time but healing the planet just as it was foretold. For what it seemed like seven days, the planet transformed - turning from a desolate ball of useless dirt to a Type 5 planet that began to nurture life again. All thanks to Alice Shaw. The Doctor beamed with satisfaction.

The little girl with so much power came back down from the sky, and she grinned at him, stepping into a run as she came back to him. She tried to catch her breath, but he could tell she was running on pure adrenaline as the rest of her body dulled with exhaustion.

"I did it! I helped grow things! I didn't hurt anyone!" Alice exclaimed. She smiled at him and asked, "Can I stay here? Can I continue to help this world? Or wait, can I go to other worlds and help them?"

Her excitement was almost too much to deny, but no, that was not how things were. On this planet, a fixed point in time, Alice Shaw was significant. Moreover, the newfound planet played a role in times to come, only this one, and its importance in the future was why Alice was here.

"I'm sorry, Alice. This is the only planet you were meant to save," he said, and she frowned. "For now." Her expression changed again.

"Right, when you meet me again," she said, and he nodded.

"I'll have a different face, but you'll know me as the Doctor," he said.

"Then this is it?" She turned around and observed her handiwork again, swelling with satisfaction.

"Yes," he said. "I'm sorry our trip was so short." He studied her seriously. "I have to take you back."

Her felicity mellowed, and she nodded in understanding. "I'm meant to be alone, like you." She stepped forward and he froze as she reached up and placed a hand over his right heart. "Two heart beats, beating twice before a pause," she said, and she looked up at him. "But it's slowing down." He frowned as he felt exposed to her. Alice Shaw knew so much about nature that it burgeoned like a star in her hand. She saved an entire world, but she could not save him, and he could see that disappointment in her eyes.

"You are not really like me, Doctor. You will not always be alone," she said, and it was the first positive thing he's heard since he heard Carmen's prophetic words. "Even if you're meant to be, like me, you won't."

She drew her hand away, and he responded. "You won't either, Alice. This is why I have to take you back. You saved this world because someday it would be important, even pinnacle for human colonization. Legends will be written about you, but you can't stay here. You may grow up alone in Coyote Sands because something is waiting for you, and you have to be there when it comes."

"When you come back?" she asks, confused by his cryptic words. The Doctor assumed she's sharp enough to know he couldn't reveal too much about her future. It was always a burden of a time traveler, to know what was going to happen and not being able to say a word. Oh, he could, but as Adelaide Brooke had taught him, he didn't have the right.

The Doctor shook his head. "No, not me. Someone for you. I meet you much later."

Alice gasped, and she stared at him, trying to find a clue to his meaning. He held out his hand and the Tardis door opened. When she took it, they walked inside and the Doctor prepared the ship to take Alice home - to grow up alone in a desert prison of her own making.

"I just want to say, Doctor, thank you," she said. She teetered at the edge of the open door of the Tardis, and she looked into his lonely eyes, and together they formed an understanding. "Just this one time, I wasn't alone. I was able to help with my abilities instead of harming people." She turned to the barren Coyote Sands and took a step forward. "But I'm going to wait here. I'm supposed to be here, Banana said so. It's safer away from everyone else. She was right about that."

The Doctor watched her stoically, and he nodded once as she disappeared out the door into the sunlight. He walked toward the door and watched her walk off, curious to where she would go. When he peeked out of the door, Alice Shaw was gone. The winds of the desert stirred up again, and a rumble of thunder shuddered throughout his body and turned his blood cold.

A storm was coming - _his_ storm, and it only reminded him that time was fading fast, and he would be left behind as the scratching winds settled into silence.

END


End file.
